Esther

"The young woman had a beautiful figure and was lovely to look at..."  - Esther 2:7

I’m trying…
Trying my best to get her out of my mind
But after I saw her on the screen that one time
It was a wrap for me -

All of a sudden
Everything started to move in slow motion
And from that day forward
My whole world was taken over

Never quite able to fully recover
Because my thoughts are held captive and smothered by
Her eyes…
Her lips…
(My lies…)
Her hips…
Got me trippin’ on an apparition
Comprised of natural beauty and nonsense

And my conscience bears witness
To the consciousness of my decision
To view her barely dressed in these images
And I’m considering this a privilege
This raven-haired, beautiful
Brown-skinned, mocha, diva
A cross between Foxy Brown
Cleopatra and the Queen of Sheba

I’ve probably said more than enough
And I don’t like where this conversation is headed;
I'm turning something the Lord made
Into something entirely different to be regretted
She’s my own private apocalypse
Revelation of the darkness of my heart
Reminding me to save some things for later
And at times, it’s best to admire from afar

It's hard because she's fine
And I try to play it off with laughter
But before I even finish the statement
All I'm thinking about is Ms. Baxter

For what it's worth,
I'm at a loss for words
And can't think of any way
To say it better

Except...

Now, I see through the mirror darkly
While constantly dreaming of Esther


(cf. 2 Samuel 11:2; Proverbs 4:23, 11:16, 30:18-19, 31:3,30; Song of Solomon 2:7; 1 Corinthians 13:12; 1 John 2:16; Matthew 5:27-30; 2 Corinthians 10:5-6; James 1:17)



Soli Deo Gloria,
Shon

Omnia Vincit Amor

“You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.” - (Song of Solomon 4:7 ESV)

She thinks I’m on one
And that my intentions are dumb
Always calling me stupid
And telling me I should know better
Sometimes she even says that I could do better…
Than her?!
No sir.
Omnia vincit amor
She’s everything I could ever want or ask for 

But she sees herself as gangly and unkempt
And when I call her beautiful
She holds me in contempt
Tells me that I put her on a pedestal
To which I reply, “Guilty as charged”
She is a lily among the thorns
And the captor of my heart
Every time I see her face
I’m reminded that it’s her lips alone
That I want to taste…
A glimpse of God’s grace
Omnia vincit amor
She’s the only one that I adore 

She rejects my neglect of her imperfections
Dissects herself through harsh introspection
And tries to convince me to see them
But she doesn’t understand
Since Jesus had to bleed for us
I have no need to make a fuss
She’s altogether lovely
Perfect from head to toe
She’s better than wine
So I have to take her in slow
Omnia vincit amor
So intoxicated by this love
That it brings me to the floor 

Fearfully and wonderfully made
So what is there possibly to hate?
I’m a zealot for her affections
It’s only her hand that I’m willing to take
Others may disregard her value
But she’s worth more than I dare to say
The statuesque features
Of such a heavenly creature
Speak to the truth…
Something the Lord’s made 

She’s not just a “dime” or a “cutie”
She carries within her a deeper beauty
A courageous heart and sense of justice
A faithful daughter; a mother on duty
So when it’s been one of those days
And it’s like the world is on her case
I find nothing but pleasure in doing all I can
To show how much I lover her
And bring a smile to her face 

Omnia vincit amor
Forevermore.


“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends…”
- (1 Corinthians 13:4-8 ESV)



Soli Deo Gloria,
Shon

Posted via email from THE CENTER (ROOM 116)

Altered Beast

For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.

- (Romans 8:13 ESV)

 

There’s a bad moon rising…

Satan’s enticing me –

Telling me to feel the fire in my lungs

Let go of my tongue

And shipwreck this relationship

Over which I’ve so graciously been given stewardship

Emotions are running high –

Strung so tight

That it’s like a thick cord

You could cut with a knife

So I fashion my words into a saber

And keep taking slice after slice

Until there is nothing left

But death…

 

Relationship thrown to the wayside

In a moment of rage

Setting the stage for a catastrophic crescendo –

A cacophony of swearing and not caring about the outcome

Don’t really care if the premise of the beef dumb

Because it doesn’t matter who’s right or left

The only thing that’s worth caring about

Is that I’ve won…HELL YES!

No. 1 with a bullet…

Let the world know that I’ve got a hair trigger

And that I ain’t afraid to pull it

Instead of going out like a sucker

I’ll show my teeth

And suck the life out of another

Dig in deep – getting all the flesh I need

But when the blood’s been drawn

And the bones picked dry

The only thing left to kill is me…

 

So I turn my aggressiveness inward

On the oppression that stifles my conscience

Go savage on my insecurities

And rest in the surety

Of the Almighty’s benevolent abundance

He is omnipotent –

So His grace is more than sufficient

To cover the inadequacy of my emotions

To deal with the feelings

That someone’s disrespecting me

 

I’m reminded that I’m a new creature –

An altered beast who desires to be meek

Overcome my desire to win

By changing my perception of defeat

So instead of assaulting a perceived adversary

I put salt in my speech

Walk in peace with grace and forgiveness

Speak softly and turn the other cheek

 

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

- (2 Corinthians 5:17 ESV)

 

Soli Deo Gloria,

Shon

 

 

Posted via email from THE CENTER (ROOM 116)

Monster

Physically disturbed to see you standing there at my door

Ready and willing to take more of what I don't have left

A soul, a will; something of value I need

Yet to you, it's all the same: you cut, I bleed

From head to toe, I've given every bit, inch by inch

Over time I thought this would prove itself to be well spent

Rent all to hell without a thing to show

Miles and miles of life

Eroding beneath the blood-stained footprints on the floor

Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.

- (Colossians 3:19 ESV)

Posted via email from THE CENTER (ROOM 116)

The Greatest of These (That Hideous Strength)

  Set me as a seal upon your heart,
  as a seal upon your arm,
 for love is strong as death,
  jealousy is fierce as the grave.
 Its flashes are flashes of fire,
  the very flame of the LORD.
(Song of Solomon 8:6 ESV)

 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
(Romans 8:38-39 ESV)

Some mismanage it

Manhandle and then abandon it

Left for dead under the overpass

After it’s been bruised up and damaged

Highly disregarded and discarded with ease

Unknown to the world, yet still, it’s the greatest of these

Still looking for answers while we put a band-aid on our cancer

It patiently waits in the dark; on the ready with the brightest of lanterns

Ready to guide us through the blinding mire of hostility

With the smoldering flame of an uncommon humility

Men say that they’d give up the world just to possess it

Only to rent it out for a meager profit, then strip it down and redress it

Even refusing to call it by its name –

Because it only responds to the truth

And they just want to defame it…

Punched, kicked, held in contempt and battered

But in spite of swollen eyes, its gaze is fixed

As if none of it matters

Never raises its voice to try to plead its case…

It carries on ‘til the end

Even if forever is however long that it takes

Pain is not the pleasure, but services as the vessel

Takes it to the final destination

Delivering the greater message

Delivered without measure – digging up the buried treasure

Hidden under the weight humanity’s mess

A task that no other could dare endeavor

To hell and back -

When we refused to bleed, it bled for us

Got stabbed in the robbery and still took on the death sentence

Parted the head of the warden and beat a path back up from the bottom

Set the captives free when it flooded their prison cells with that living water

Instead of coveting lust, it holds a covenant up in front of us

Reflects the beauty of its purity and shows us truly wonderful

Faith unwavering and a hope assured that never expires

Its power never ceases even after the world that we know is retired

Not to be confused with seductive bedroom eyes

Pursuit of the one night stand or catching a glimpse of her thighs

A strong back to hold onto while you’re lying in bed

Or lies that he’ll wanna tell so that you’ll open your legs

Sex out of context is only there for a moment

And involves giving up your ghost to someone who doesn’t own it

Less than and three may put a heart on your screen

But it’ll never give you a love that’s greater than these

When I’m worse it makes me better

When I wanna quit, it tells me, “never”

When I can’t stand, it keeps me movin’

When I fall apart, it holds me together

It reminds me that I’m cherished

And that I’ll never ever be severed

Forgives all of my inadequacy

And never lets me for get it

When I start to believe that redemption is completely impossible

It lifts up my heavy head through the grace of the Gospel

The same that gave sight to blind men and dead men life

Is the same that can take a whore and turn her into a wife

No matter how promiscuous, this thing is so relentless

It pursues to the end and will have your beggin’ for forgiveness

Yes, there’s only one thing that can remove our stain and our stench…

Love is stronger than death; such a hideous strength.

 So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.
(1 Corinthians 13:13 ESV)

 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. We love because he first loved us.
(1 John 4:18-19 ESV)

Soli Deo Gloria,

Shon

Posted via email from THE CENTER (ROOM 116)

Blind, Crippled & Crazy...For Her: The Hard Truth About Lust

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.
(Matthew 5:27-30 ESV)

 

"Look, but don't touch."

This seems to be the common suggestion given these days as a way to handle lust. If you can pull this off, it supposedly demonstrates a heightened ability of self-control. You hear it all the time; "I love my wife, but it doesn't hurt to look every now and again". As long as you don't "sample the merchandise", you're golden. The ladies aren't exempt from this either. But, what is even sadder is when I hear a married woman say something to the effect of how she doesn't mind if here husband looks - as long as he doesn't cheat - because he's gonna look anyway. The only thought that runs through my mind when I hear someone say that is, "you're lying". This is the answer you get because they've just settled for having someone there, but not really having their heart. This begs the question: Is it really worth having at all? Should we not expect a higher standard of the person who has vowed to spend the rest of our lives with? And if you're single, there's no magic switch for turning off the emotions of lust. While, indeed, you have more liberty in your life than say one who is in a marraige, that liberty cannot be abused. Making a habit of lusting will become just that - a habit. If you continue to give way to it, you will reap its harvest. It won't just go away even after you've entered into marraige because you've made a career out of not being faithful with your eyes (and now the heart wants to follow).

As we have seen from the Scriptures, looking is adultery, which makes it grounds for divorce (Matt. 5:31-32). To make lame excuses for looking in a society where we are bombarded with images and words that seek to do nothing but provoke our lustful desires, we must remember that the bond between a man and woman is as much spiritual as it is physical. So, the best way to combat this is not to resolve to use mere behavior modification tactics to curb destructive and corrosive behavior. After all, an alcoholic is still an alcoholic even if he's trapped on a desert island with no where for miles to buy a beer. Christ gives us the gory anlogy of ripping and tearing off limbs and body parts (not to be taken literally, of course) in Matt. 5:29-30 of our passage. The point of the gruesome imagery is this: TRUE LOVE CARRIES WITH IT A VISCERAL HOSTILITY TOWARDS ALL IMPOSTERS.

In other words, if we are truly compelled by the love of Christ, then we will listen to his words. And in turn this will carry over into a steadfast vigilance and zeal for our significant others (Song of Solomon 8:6). If you are in a commited relationship, you shouldn't get all geeked up off of the fact someone else is trying to make a move on you or is consistent in their blatant disregard for that bond. It should make you angry. Mind you, I'm not telling you to drill someone in the face for making a pass at you, but you should say or do something. Because if you don't take the proper measures, the second you begin to mildly entertain any sort "flirting", you've already stepped into the realm of marital unfaithfulness. The true enemy in adultery is my "inner-me". So all vigilance first and foremost must be turned on the fleshly desire to give in to temptation to throw discernment and caution to the wind.

Here's an illustration-- 

Say you and your wife have an argument. Okay, sure. It happens. But, let's say also that while you and your wife are having issues, a young attractive female at work (who you already know has a "thing" for you) becomes your sounding board. She becomes your encourager. Now, the next time you get into it with your wife, the first thing you think is, "I bet ___ from work would never think that way about me...". And there you are on a downward spiral toward infidelity and spiritual destruction -- all because you failed to (as Steven Lawson would put it) hear the hiss of the serpent in the statement.

For us to understand these principles clearly, our minds and hearts must be renewed from this fallen world. We must take every thought captive to the Word until it is brought under submission to it. There is not a soul with a half a bit of sanity who thinks that they can go knocking on Potiphar's door (cf. Genesis 39) and expect to make an escape from the snare the awaits them. Lust is a drowning machine; the deeper you wade into the current, the more it pulls you under. Lust is a liar. It promises you everything you could possibly want, but never truly delivers. Lust is a thief. All the while it's showing you "the goods", while robbing you of your own. Lust is a deciever. It disguises itself as passion, yet is as promiscuous as ever. Lust is a killer. It murders you from the inside out.

But you can't blame her really. The girl can't help it. She's just like her dad (John 8:44, 2 Cor. 11:14)...

 

"Now if I listen to this radio, then I might have to split open a swisher and fill it wit green pine--and if I listen to this TV, then you would catch me chasin' plenty chicks 'cause homie, they fine--but I DDT my mind, put my flesh in a figure 4--yeah, sometimes I fall, but this right here ain't gone kill me though--even if I have to be a blind amputee I promise that my Father here is purgin' me of all of my impurity--Bang on 'em! Bang on 'em! Go hard, Father! Reign on 'em! Reign on 'em! Show you God--'Cause every time I slow up, that's when my Father show up--make way for an escape and I'm right back scrappin' like, 'What up?!'--Tell my TV to shut up--what you sellin', I don't want it--hide that Word inside my heart--Ron Artest, gon' and guard it--So I don't want yo goodies, baby--you can keep yo cookies, baby--I know they got M&M's, but this road I'm on is slim 'n' shady."  - PRo (Covenant Eyes)

Proverbs 5:1-23; 6:20-34; 7:6-27; 9:13-18

 

Soli Deo Gloria,

Shon

Posted via email from THE CENTER (ROOM 116)

...Against Such Things There Is No Law: What I Know About Love (pt. 2)

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7 ESV)

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.
(Galatians 5:22-23 ESV)

But, are we truly free to marry whoever we love?

“Love is not a legal category. Love has never been a legal category. If you think that love makes a family, then what does it mean when a man decides he no longer loves his wife, he no longer loves his children, and he wants to walk out and never pay child support again? After all, ‘It’s love that makes a family’; why should he be forced to pay child support? It doesn’t make any sense to use love as a binding legal category. Besides, would you really want the government inquiring about who loves who? And also, there are plenty of loving relationships that are based on love that we would never even think about having marriage around…so you love your child, you love your sister, you love your best friend. But that’s not a marriage; nobody believes for a moment that that’s a fitting relationship for a marriage. So, what kind of love are we talking about, and in the end, what is the social purpose of marriage? If all marriage is supposed to do is affirm people who love one another, then we need to ask ourselves why do we need marriage in the first place? And the answer is we don’t need marriage if that’s its only purpose! We need marriage for completely different purposes that the advocates of same-sex marriage never want to even think about.” – Dr. Jennifer Roback Morse

In short, what we need to remember this: Marriage is the safeguard for love, not the other way around...

Soli Deo Gloria,

Shon

Posted via email from THE CENTER (ROOM 116)

What I "Know" About Love

"For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known." - 1 Corinthians 13:12

The "know" here is not speaking of mere head-knowledge or intellectual ascent ; in fact, it is a different word in the greek ('epignosimai' rather than 'ginosko') - here, Paul is speaking of "know" in the most intimate of context (much like Adam "knew" Eve - Genesis 4:1). So the literal translation would actually read more, "...we will love intimately as we have fully been loved intimately". When understood in context, it sheds much needed light on this passage; everything that we do now, including love, is done "in part" (incomplete). It is this way until the maturation process is completed in the return of Christ. At that point, all other things, save love (1 Corinthians 13:8), will cease because the culmination of God's love for his creation will be fully comprehended. The reason for the ceasing of things like prophecy and tongues is because their purpose will be terminated by the presence of the One in whom they point to...all that will be left is Love unsurpassed and unhindered in the ultimate of intimacy: face to face fellowship everlasting with the Godhead.

Talk about a Valentine's Day...


Soli Deo Gloria,
Shon

Posted via email from THE CENTER (ROOM 116)

LOVE

"Love is different than you think; it's never in a song or on a TV screen..." - Derek Webb


Derek Webb - Lover


"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life." - John 3:16 ESV

By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. - 1 John 3:16 ESV

In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. - 1 John 4:10 ESV

For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome. - 1 John 5:3 ESV

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." - Matthew 11:28-30 ESV

Happy Valentine's Day!!

Soli Deo Gloria,

Shon