Esther

"The young woman had a beautiful figure and was lovely to look at..."  - Esther 2:7

I’m trying…
Trying my best to get her out of my mind
But after I saw her on the screen that one time
It was a wrap for me -

All of a sudden
Everything started to move in slow motion
And from that day forward
My whole world was taken over

Never quite able to fully recover
Because my thoughts are held captive and smothered by
Her eyes…
Her lips…
(My lies…)
Her hips…
Got me trippin’ on an apparition
Comprised of natural beauty and nonsense

And my conscience bears witness
To the consciousness of my decision
To view her barely dressed in these images
And I’m considering this a privilege
This raven-haired, beautiful
Brown-skinned, mocha, diva
A cross between Foxy Brown
Cleopatra and the Queen of Sheba

I’ve probably said more than enough
And I don’t like where this conversation is headed;
I'm turning something the Lord made
Into something entirely different to be regretted
She’s my own private apocalypse
Revelation of the darkness of my heart
Reminding me to save some things for later
And at times, it’s best to admire from afar

It's hard because she's fine
And I try to play it off with laughter
But before I even finish the statement
All I'm thinking about is Ms. Baxter

For what it's worth,
I'm at a loss for words
And can't think of any way
To say it better

Except...

Now, I see through the mirror darkly
While constantly dreaming of Esther


(cf. 2 Samuel 11:2; Proverbs 4:23, 11:16, 30:18-19, 31:3,30; Song of Solomon 2:7; 1 Corinthians 13:12; 1 John 2:16; Matthew 5:27-30; 2 Corinthians 10:5-6; James 1:17)



Soli Deo Gloria,
Shon

Slave

“Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who practices sin is a slave to sin." - John 8:34

It’s open season on the blackamoor…

And four score and seven
Only serves as a reminder
Of how far we are from heaven
Linkin’ us to a past
But we’re too easily forgettin’
The bondage that’s awaitin’
And treat it like a broken record

We scratch it up and mix it
Tryin’ to put a new spin on it
Thinkin’ that if we spend enough dough
That’s all we need to depend on
But those whips and chains are now whips and chains
Money stacks and diamond rings
As we tiptoe through the cotton rows
Chasin’ after the “finer things”

The same thing that is
Rainin’ down on Jupiter
Is the very same thing
That we’re willing to become captives for
The love of money
Is the mother of invention
Rooted in all kinds of evil
And limitless in its potential

Becoming a slave
Is much easier than we think
So many give up their freedom
Just to own a couple of trinkets –

Tinkertoys that pale in comparison to Zion
And precious jewels that will one day pave the streets
Our feet will tread on…

(cf. Hebrews 13:5; 1 Timothy 6:10)


Soli Deo Gloria,
Shon

Yellow Brick Rd.

It’s the end of an era -
A world gripped by terror
Got people trippin’ over love
‘Cause we fell in love with a felon
Ponzi schemes are sellin’
But the gold rush is failin’
We’ve been blinded by the lust
And the symptoms are very tellin’

Green eyes and a coal-black heart
Lead to paper thin motives
And a conscience that’s brutally scarred
Marred up and parked out in the driveway
With a six cylinder engine
That gets great mileage on the highway

The tin man is down
Long live the scarecrow
And Dorothy’s been on the pole
Ever since she got a taste of the rainbow
A case of mistaken identity
Got the lion all twisted
Thought he was the king of the jungle
But he was only there for a visit

Whether it’s twenty-one grams
Or twenty-one karats
Souls sell for cheap
When we raise the stock in our malice
For the slippers, or the crown
Or a heart that’s bought and sold…

All of life is vanity on the yellow brick road.


Soli Deo Gloria,
Shon

Strabismus

 Her feet go down to death;
 her steps follow the path to Sheol;
 she does not ponder the path of life;
 her ways wander, and she does not know it.
(Proverbs 5:5-6 ESV)

 

A silhouette breaks through the pattern of the bed sheet
And in that moment, I realize that I am in too deep…
But I keep pressing forward with my hands
Because I can no longer make out the lines in the sand

So I become a slave to the senselessness of my senses
Just a taste, a feel, or a touch
And suddenly the voices drown away in the distance
Reminiscent of flying –
Bodies crashing and burning
But the height of the ecstasy
Leaves me wanton and yearning

Because the more that I take
The more that it aches
And the more that the lines become blurred
The less I’m willing to wait
Until I’m crossed-eyed and feverish -
Suffering from strabismus
It’s led me to a duplicitous reality
And a heart that is desperately abysmal

Lusting after lust
Constantly frustrated by trust
Relying on primal instincts of my flesh
To relieve the agony of the rush
As it makes its way to my head
And the things that I’ve hardly ever said
Hunt me down with a vengeance
Love’s not just blind…now it’s dead

And with this ring, I thee wed
Like a noose that hangs from the bedpost
Meshing my affections with the conquests
As I place them on the mantle above my ego
Erotomania claims another victim
Barely a mention; only sealed with a kiss…

Sex is death. Death is sex.
It says it right here on my crucifix.

 

 

Sheol and Abaddon are never satisfied,
and never satisfied are the eyes of man.
(Proverbs 27:20 ESV)

 

 

 

Soli Deo Gloria,

Shon

Blind, Crippled & Crazy...For Her: The Hard Truth About Lust

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.
(Matthew 5:27-30 ESV)

 

"Look, but don't touch."

This seems to be the common suggestion given these days as a way to handle lust. If you can pull this off, it supposedly demonstrates a heightened ability of self-control. You hear it all the time; "I love my wife, but it doesn't hurt to look every now and again". As long as you don't "sample the merchandise", you're golden. The ladies aren't exempt from this either. But, what is even sadder is when I hear a married woman say something to the effect of how she doesn't mind if here husband looks - as long as he doesn't cheat - because he's gonna look anyway. The only thought that runs through my mind when I hear someone say that is, "you're lying". This is the answer you get because they've just settled for having someone there, but not really having their heart. This begs the question: Is it really worth having at all? Should we not expect a higher standard of the person who has vowed to spend the rest of our lives with? And if you're single, there's no magic switch for turning off the emotions of lust. While, indeed, you have more liberty in your life than say one who is in a marraige, that liberty cannot be abused. Making a habit of lusting will become just that - a habit. If you continue to give way to it, you will reap its harvest. It won't just go away even after you've entered into marraige because you've made a career out of not being faithful with your eyes (and now the heart wants to follow).

As we have seen from the Scriptures, looking is adultery, which makes it grounds for divorce (Matt. 5:31-32). To make lame excuses for looking in a society where we are bombarded with images and words that seek to do nothing but provoke our lustful desires, we must remember that the bond between a man and woman is as much spiritual as it is physical. So, the best way to combat this is not to resolve to use mere behavior modification tactics to curb destructive and corrosive behavior. After all, an alcoholic is still an alcoholic even if he's trapped on a desert island with no where for miles to buy a beer. Christ gives us the gory anlogy of ripping and tearing off limbs and body parts (not to be taken literally, of course) in Matt. 5:29-30 of our passage. The point of the gruesome imagery is this: TRUE LOVE CARRIES WITH IT A VISCERAL HOSTILITY TOWARDS ALL IMPOSTERS.

In other words, if we are truly compelled by the love of Christ, then we will listen to his words. And in turn this will carry over into a steadfast vigilance and zeal for our significant others (Song of Solomon 8:6). If you are in a commited relationship, you shouldn't get all geeked up off of the fact someone else is trying to make a move on you or is consistent in their blatant disregard for that bond. It should make you angry. Mind you, I'm not telling you to drill someone in the face for making a pass at you, but you should say or do something. Because if you don't take the proper measures, the second you begin to mildly entertain any sort "flirting", you've already stepped into the realm of marital unfaithfulness. The true enemy in adultery is my "inner-me". So all vigilance first and foremost must be turned on the fleshly desire to give in to temptation to throw discernment and caution to the wind.

Here's an illustration-- 

Say you and your wife have an argument. Okay, sure. It happens. But, let's say also that while you and your wife are having issues, a young attractive female at work (who you already know has a "thing" for you) becomes your sounding board. She becomes your encourager. Now, the next time you get into it with your wife, the first thing you think is, "I bet ___ from work would never think that way about me...". And there you are on a downward spiral toward infidelity and spiritual destruction -- all because you failed to (as Steven Lawson would put it) hear the hiss of the serpent in the statement.

For us to understand these principles clearly, our minds and hearts must be renewed from this fallen world. We must take every thought captive to the Word until it is brought under submission to it. There is not a soul with a half a bit of sanity who thinks that they can go knocking on Potiphar's door (cf. Genesis 39) and expect to make an escape from the snare the awaits them. Lust is a drowning machine; the deeper you wade into the current, the more it pulls you under. Lust is a liar. It promises you everything you could possibly want, but never truly delivers. Lust is a thief. All the while it's showing you "the goods", while robbing you of your own. Lust is a deciever. It disguises itself as passion, yet is as promiscuous as ever. Lust is a killer. It murders you from the inside out.

But you can't blame her really. The girl can't help it. She's just like her dad (John 8:44, 2 Cor. 11:14)...

 

"Now if I listen to this radio, then I might have to split open a swisher and fill it wit green pine--and if I listen to this TV, then you would catch me chasin' plenty chicks 'cause homie, they fine--but I DDT my mind, put my flesh in a figure 4--yeah, sometimes I fall, but this right here ain't gone kill me though--even if I have to be a blind amputee I promise that my Father here is purgin' me of all of my impurity--Bang on 'em! Bang on 'em! Go hard, Father! Reign on 'em! Reign on 'em! Show you God--'Cause every time I slow up, that's when my Father show up--make way for an escape and I'm right back scrappin' like, 'What up?!'--Tell my TV to shut up--what you sellin', I don't want it--hide that Word inside my heart--Ron Artest, gon' and guard it--So I don't want yo goodies, baby--you can keep yo cookies, baby--I know they got M&M's, but this road I'm on is slim 'n' shady."  - PRo (Covenant Eyes)

Proverbs 5:1-23; 6:20-34; 7:6-27; 9:13-18

 

Soli Deo Gloria,

Shon

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